January 19, 2006 | Funny Bits

Return of the gay cannibal

German Bernd Jurgen Brandes found out the hard way that when cruising for sex online, you should choose your words carefully. Words like "meat" and "swallow," and phrases like "eating ass," might give your lover the wrong idea -- especially if he happens to be a cannibal!

Brandes responded to a personals ad posted by a man who was seeking a lover who would allow himself to be killed and eaten as part of a sexual game, Gay.com U.K. reports. That man was fellow German Armin Meiwes, who was sentenced to eight years in prison in 2004 for playing his so-called "sexual game."

Meiwes, 44, was back in court last week, however, for a retrial. The German appeals court argues that he should be convicted of murder and sentenced to life in prison. Meiwes escaped murder charges in his first trial because he argued that Brandes was a willing participant who got off on his own death. The court -- which witnessed a video of Meiwes cutting off his victim's penis, and then eating it while he was still alive -- could not prove otherwise.

This time, however, the appeals court says the trial's outcome will be different. While Meiwes is expected to liken his crime to euthanasia, prosecutors will argue that he duped the court in his original trial and that he killed purely for sexual gratification.

The lesson here? Beware of blow jobs with teeth! But then again, you already knew that, right?

• German court retries man in cannibal case [gay.com]